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I'm a simple man, not a simpleton. The worst thing any of our leaders can do is to get those two things confused. I'm a warrior for those things I believe in. I stand up for my friends, family, God, and country. All I truly want is for the government to stay as far out of my life as I can get it. Oh and just in case you haven't guessed it; I'm conservative in my bones.

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Sunday, May 24, 2009

When Passions Collide

Today's post is more a request for aid than a rant or political statement. Recently, my two passions, my family and my country have collided. There is an old addage that opposites attract and this is certainly the case between me and my wife. I am one of the most political of creatures and she is not. The difference in us, is without a doubt, due to the fundamental difference in our experiences. She's neve left her hometown for any length of time in her 38 years and I've never really had a hometown in mine. I joined the Army at the tender age of 17 because even then I felt that I should give back to this nation. In the Army I was given a sense of my place in the world and in my nation. A warrior ethos was instilled in me that I retain after 20 years of being out of the military. She on the other hand, has worked 2 jobs in her adult life. Both here in Hometown, Ok.

For those that are familiar with some of my older and more introspective posts, it is clear that I am both a patriot and an evangelical christian. I believe in the Constitution and our Founding Fathers' collective wisdom in what they created. Even in the dissenting views that almost kept our great republic from even being formed. I am also a believer in the Bible and find more and more relief in the words in red. I also see in the bible, a total lack of any reference to this nation. Therefore, I have to concede the eventual destruction of this nation. Or in the very least, the hamstringing of it. These beliefs form the core of my very stubborn and conflicted view of America.

My wife on the other hand is new to her faith and tends to live in the here and now. By here I mean within the family unit, and by now I mean literally NOW. She doesn't try to plan for the future and it is left to me to try for increases in our fortunes. This is the end all, be all of her existance. Get up, go to work, eat, sleep. Rinse and repeat. In her mind, there are no other REAL priorities outside of the family. Honor and Duty ONLY apply to dealing with family matters.

This is the crux of my collision of obligations. She says that I have not been truly happy since I started getting politically involved. She says that she feels that I ignore my family for the political discourse and that my values are skewed. I believe she even said that I was obsessing about it. No arguments on my part that I AM trying to take care of my kids, by trying to ensure their futures fell on deaf ears. All of my efforts to explain my views on Service, Duty, and Honor as they reflect in my belief structure, may as well have been arguments against the wind blowing. They made that little of a dent.

So here I am, asking for you, my friends, to come to my aid and help me discover a way to reach and teach my wife, exactly who and what she married 6 years ago.

21 comments:

Grace Explosion said...
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Greywolfe said...

Thanks Grace. I appreciate what you're saying. It's definately food for thought. As for the U.S.A in Scripture, I'll have to do some more looking into Rev. commentaries and do some reading. I know that in Ezekiel during Magogs war, Israel will stand alone against all commers. Given our status as the chief backer of Israel, something will have to give in order for us to lose the ability and or desire to aid her.

If we do, as you state, become more of a Christian nation, then why on earth would we abandon her to Persia (iran) and Magog (Russia/Georgia)?

Grace Explosion said...
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Grace Explosion said...
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Gramma 2 Many said...

After what Grace wrote, you do not need any more advice.
I will also come from a womans' prospective. Probably repeating what Grace already said, but I must reinforce one point she made so clearly. We women must know that we are loved. Telling us that when we married is not enough. We need to be shown repeatedly. We feel neglected when our husband comes home eats dinner, belches and plops down on the couch for tv or in front of the computer. For many of us, our love language is one of time. If time is spent with us, talking to us, listening to us, helping with dishes and getting babies to bed, it speaks volumes. Not knowing you personally, I am just taking a shot in the dark, but I think that as Grace said, if you were to carve out that time for her, she would be a little more willing to tune into what you are saying.
Israel standing alone? Looks like our illustrious leader will take care of that for her.

Greywolfe said...

Grace, I really don't see the scriptures through the same eyes that you do. Perhaps it is a question of the Spirit speaking to me, or of me interpreting/misinterpreting the message. To me, and to others that I study with, the message is very different.

However, having said that, I truly hope that you are correct in your belief that America will turn back to God. I fear though, that it is the other way around. From the actions taken by the government and by huge legal/political entities such as the ACLU and others, the push is to remove more and more of Christianity from our lives.

So, perhaps its a bit of the natural cynicism that I was born with, but I feel that we more resemble the Rome of old than the new Israel.

Shalom!

Greywolfe said...

Granmma, Thanks for what you have said. Coming as it has from two women, I can't ignore the advice. I will put it to practice starting today.

Here's hoping it helps.

Joe said...

As a student and teacher of Scripture for more than fifty years, I can tell you that there is absolutely, positively NO reference to the United States of America found therein.

Those who find it must play a twist and turn game with words and principles in the Bible. They usually miss the entire point of God's Word.

When I find myself in the position of disagreeing with my wife over something that is important, the first place I have to look is to me.

Am I holding a position that is either arrogant or not all that important in meeting her needs?

See, the way I see it, her needs take precidence over mine.

Fourunately for me, she has the same attitude toward me.

Since discovering that marriage is not about me, but about the union of the two of us through Christ, our marriage has taken on a whole new meaning.

It boils down to this: In Christ, each member of the marraige must put the needs of the other before his/her own needs...spiritually, emotionally, economically, physically and in all other areas, expecting nothing in return.

Practically speaking, I would say that she is not ready for instruction in things political and/or philosophical, and so a great cut-back on those areas on your part is in order AS THEY INVOLVE HER.

I do my political stuff when my wife is involved with something else (or has gone shopping or something).

I pray you find the proper balance and methodology while still finding the wherewithall to keep up your need to express yourself.

Bless you both.

Greywolfe said...

Joe, you hit the nail on the head. I appreciate your comments about how to change things up and still get through my responsibilities.

I also, appreciate your comments on scripture and America. That's pretty much the place I am coming from. America does not have a place in scripture that I have been able to find and if you take our socio-economic and political footprint on the planet into consideration, the only reason I can find for that omission is the eventual collapse of the U.S. as a world power before the end times prophecies come about.

My personal belief is that we stand on the threshhold of Magog's war. And with Barry leading us down the path to ruination, and China's rise in world power, I fear we're seeing the final decline of the Republic.

Z said...

I admire your honesty and plea for advice, Greywolfe......
I found the discussion of America in the Bible fascinating, thanks,everyone.
I don't know enough to chime in on that, but I will say I firmly believe God created our country; it's only since we started to ignore Him that things have started going to hell with a breathtaking, heartbreaking speed.

By the way, DID Mrs. Greywolfe marry who you are now six years ago? I'd think about that..and how you two can relight that flame you remember. I'll be praying for you.

Greywolfe said...

Z, Thanks as always for stopping in, and I totally agree with your assessment of when our decline started.

As for the Mrs... Well, I have always been a political animal. It is a by product of being a soldier. If I was going to fight, kill, or die for this nation I should take a part in its political processes too.

Unfortunately for my dear wife, there has not been such a crisis as the one we are now experiencing, for me to get fired up about. So the answer to your question is yes and no. I am still who she married, but she may not have known this side of me, before now. Or rather to say the depth of this side of me.

Z said...

I see, thanks. And when you talk about the ramifications of what's happening in America, if we don't stop it NOW, she's only thinking, as you'd said "in the now"? I'm sure you've tried to explain...
I continue to pray! Good luck, Greywolfe.

Ducky's here said...

Wesley Snipes had a great line in "White Men Can't Jump":

"Listen to the woman".

Greywolfe said...

Yeah, Z, I've tried to explain it all to her. And she get's that glazed eye look and starts drooling. Her POV is that if it isn't effecting the kids school life or either of our jobs, then it doesn't bare any significance to our lives and should be ignored.

As I say, it's a collision of my passions, not merely an impasse

Dean said...

No doubt about it. Relationships are difficult.
You obviously care about your wife or you wouldn't have reached out.

I have no advice that will help except to pray about it and to remind your wife it takes two people to make a marriage work but only one to wreck it.

Some people have found this site helpful; http://www.fireproofmymarriage.com/
and this book has helped hundreds; http://thelovedarebook.com/

Z said...

there's the point: it DOES affect EVERYTHING.Culturally, real bad stuff's happening in our schools...your children need not know that "Billy Has Two Mommies!" or how best to apply a condom ..or how we're going to be under 20 ft of water in 2 years due to GLOBAL WARMING(not)...and, as for your jobs; if the economy tanks, if socialism takes over, if nationalized health hits, you're DONE! America DOES affect our lives..we ARE AMERICA; when America slides, we slide!

End of sermon. Sorry! but, really...dontcha think so? xx

Gramma 2 Many said...

How are you doing? Worrying and hoping for the best. Do go look at the Fireproof site.
A little story. My hubs had not worn his ring for years. I had given up on asking him why. We watched Fireproof one night. When it was over, I saw him look down at his finger. The next day, he took his ring to the jeweler to have it resized and began wearing it again.

richard mcenroe said...

You need to understand that your wife has had the mixed fortune to live in easy times. She does not have anything different to compare them to. Be patient with her, because these next few years will not be easy for her. Sadly, I fear you will find many opportunities in the near future to show her that this political world she wants to ignore will not ignore her. Just be ready to support her as she tries to deal with the conflict between what she wants and what is.

Greywolfe said...

Gramma, I'm doing pretty well. I have to thank all of you ladies that have given me such good advice. It's helping on the home front. I just got back from the fireproof site. It was just a quick-see but looks promising.

Z, you are dead-bang on the spot.

Richard, thanks for dropping in and I agree with your estimation of the times we live in. And I'm afraid you are right about the "I told you so" factor, although you didn't put it that way.

Support is probably the only thing I will be able to do.

Z said...

Gramma, what a wonderful thing about the wedding ring!

Richard's right and I think a subtle way of bringing up his points might help. "Honey, you just don't know what's ahead and I'm seeing some rough stuff....it's one thing to live in the NOW because I know your plate's full and just staying HERE keeps you busy enough without worrying about the future and I appreciate that, but I worry because it's about US and our KIDS and I want their future as bright as ours was.." you'll do it better than I. It's worth (another?) try!

WomanHonorThyself said...

Keep showing her your love and keep loving and fighting for your precious Country my friend..we ALL need u!!!

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